First, if you’re offended by the post title, learn to have a sense of humor and relax a little. You might live a little longer. And if you take the advice in this post, you’ll likely enjoy those extra years a lot more.

The other day I wrote a post over at copyblogger about affiliate marketing and in the comments of the post, someone made a remark that is a comment I’ve heard said many times (though in different words, but same gist) in response to posts/advice by what some might call “higher profile bloggers”:

“Of course, it doesn’t hurt having a blog that already has wide readership…these tactics alone don’t result in a ‘four-figure commission check’.”

Now, I’m not picking on the original commenter here… but his comment, mainly because it has been given so many times by people as a reason for [insert medium to high profile blogger’s name here] success and as an excuse for [insert blog reader’s name here] inability to duplicate it due to some kind of inferred (almost “unfair”) “advantage”, spurred me to respond:

I know you specifically probably didn’t mean it “like this” Mike but, I wasn’t handed a blog with a readership… I built it up, same as I have any of the affiliate sites I own. My “wide readership” isn’t the sole reason I sold themes. If I hadn’t done the above, I’d have sold a few, but no where near as many as I did. I can say that with certainty after a decade in this industry.

And then, I closed my response with:

There is no reason someone else can’t build up their site same as I have with many of them, and use these tactics with four, five and six figure success. Except maybe their own willingness to accept defeat.

So, if you’re someone who has been “accepting your defeat”, I have a message for you…

I have “every reason” to have been not only “allowed”, but expected, to “fail” in life. The only difference between my success and someone else’s lack of it is that I refused to accept, and still do refuse to accept, anything less than what I want for myself in life.

I don’t give myself excuses.

I don’t wait for shit to be handed to me, I go in search of what I want.

I found my pair of balls (which to me is a combination of belief in myself and a lack of “fear of failing”) and went after what I wanted.

If you want success… if you want anything in life for that matter… the large majority of us will only reach our goals by going after them with everything we have and picking ourselves up after every failure, continuing to go after them with everything we have until we reach/achieve them. Period.

To let John Andrews sum it up:

“And I don’t believe Rae Hoffman is as much of a genius as she is hard worker.”


  • fearing what “the community” will think (who cares?)
  • fearing a fall on your face (you will, likely many times)
  • fearing the uncertain (life is never certain, even when you play it safe)
  • allowing your circumstances to impede your achievements (there is no “excuse” for accepting the status quo)
  • fearing the unknown (I’d rather be uncertain of my success than be predictable in my mediocrity)


  • working towards your wants instead of talking about them (theory and “what ifs” aren’t going to get you anywhere)
  • taking chances and sticking your pecker out
  • using your “proverbial balls” to go after what you want in life and make it happen

YOU HAVE A CHOICE. But ONLY YOU can make it.

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